Self- Care: Deeper than Stress
By: Deborah Vincent
About two years ago, if you had asked me what self-care was, I probably wouldn’t be able to answer that. But when you ask someone what exactly stress is, their first answer is often about something they are struggling with externally. Certainly, there is a general definition of stress. It’s defined when “environmental demands [exceed] the capacity for effective response” (Parsonson & Alquicira, 2019). Unfortunately for professionals, this can often be their workplace and home life. When that stress is at its utmost height, we begin to experience burnout; “emotional exhaustion, depersonalization, and reduced personal accomplishment (Parsonson & Alqucira, 2019). As professionals, this can be detrimental to patients but also to the mental and physical health of the professional. The risk of this for professionals, such as therapists, is that they may find themselves unable to regain energy and focus without a break (Pope & Vasquez, 20005). In an early study, it was found that among therapists working with sex offenders, “half had experienced emotional hardening, rising, and confrontation; more than a third suffered frustration with society or the correctional system; and one quarter experienced burnout” (Parsonson & Alquicira, 2019). This can look different in everyone. You may no longer see the value in your work. You might even begin to ignore crucial information with patients.
So, what should one do? Can we use self-care to alleviate something deeper than stress?
For starters, I know it is so easy to bury yourself in your work. We can sometimes use work as an excuse to not deal with the outside world. But you are more than just your work. You might be a mother, a wonderful cook, quite the explorer. Who are you outside of work? Who do you wish to become?
Is it clear now that there is so much more to self-care than removing stress?
Self-care is about taking a moment to center yourself, realizing what’s important to you. But it goes hand in hand with being mindful of yourself, your thoughts, your intentions. Being self-aware of your emotions.
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A great book, “Mindfulness for Beginners”, was introduced to me by a professor roughly two years ago. It consists of multiple activities. Here are just two activities that I think truly made a difference in my approach to life.
I hope they can do the same for you. Take a moment, 5 minutes or so, to yourself and pick one of these activities.
- Take 5 minutes out of your day and write about the person in your life that you appreciate. Why? What would you tell them if they were standing here with you?
- “Morning Pages” Write down everything you’re thinking. EVERYTHING. Do this for as long as you think you can go. Now reading back at your page, what do you notice? Any patterns?
How do you feel? I hope this is something you can adopt into your everyday life. It should be clear now that relieving stress is more than just self-care but also about “[maintaining] equilibrium or homeostasis within a self-system such that the professional self does not impinge on the personal self and vice versa” (Bressi & Vaden, 2017).
References:
Bressi, S.K., Vaden, E.R. Reconsidering Self Care. Clin Soc Work J 45, 33–38 (2017). https://doi-org.ezproxy.bu.edu/10.1007/s10615-016-0575-4
Parsonson, K., & Alquicira, L. (2019). The Power of Being There for Each Other: The Importance of Self-Awareness, Identifying Stress and Burnout, and Proactive Self-Care Strategies for Sex-Offender Treatment Providers. International Journal of Offender Therapy and Comparative Criminology, 63(11), 2018–2037. https://doi.org/10.1177/0306624X19841773
Pope, Kenneth S.; Vasquez, Melba J. T. (2005); In: How to survive and thrive as a therapist: Information, ideas, and resources for psychologists in practice. Pope, Kenneth S.; Vasquez, Melba J. T.; Publisher: American Psychological Association, pp. 13-21. [Chapter]