{"id":179,"date":"2017-04-25T16:31:21","date_gmt":"2017-04-25T20:31:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/?p=179"},"modified":"2017-04-27T11:03:08","modified_gmt":"2017-04-27T15:03:08","slug":"learning-new-self-care","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/2017\/04\/25\/learning-new-self-care\/","title":{"rendered":"Learning New Self Care"},"content":{"rendered":"

Self care is important for everyone- including myself. This a basic, and almost obvious statement but for me it took me far too long to realize. When I get stressed the way I cope is by doing more. This may seem counterintuitive, and often it is. Whenever I feel overwhelmed by school, family, friends or just life in general my natural reaction is to just do something else rather than deal with the problem at hand. A few months ago I couldn\u2019t even fathom the idea of just doing nothing or doing something purely for myself. Years of doing this made me normalize my behavior. I would explain to my mom, my boyfriend, friends, doctor, everyone that cared about me that always being busy calmed me down. I was lying to them and more importantly I was lying to myself. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I told myself that because I was doing something productive that it was healthy. My anxiousness and feeling like I lacked any real control in life typically manifested itself by me becoming obsessed with menial things that I felt like I could control. For example I would rewrite my class notes 4 times, not because I needed to and not even necessarily because it helped me learn better. I did it because it was something I could control. I thought this process was cathartic, I thought it helped me calm down. Looking back I realized that it was just another stressor in my life. My life was being controlled by what I thought I was controlling. I became obsessed with counting everything I did, from the notes I took to the number of grapes I ate, I really felt like I was doing well. Because I was getting good grades and maintaining important relationships in my life I refused to see that this was unhealthy. To me this was self-care. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0I always recognized the importance of self-care, but not always for myself. If anyone suggested \u00a0I try something other than my rituals that gave me a sense of control, I would very defensive and explain why my self care was the best. I was so in need of structure and control that the thought of doing something healthy, and relaxing like taking time to breathe or sit down and have a nice meal or even something as watching TV felt like a waste of time for me. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0My journey to discovering self care has not been an easy one, and I am still trying to figure out what works best for me. However, this class in addition to working at SARP has helped me see that yes even I need self care. Everyone needs it including myself. Taking time for yourself is healthy, not lazy. I would be lying if I said there aren\u2019t days when my stress gets the best of me and I rewrite my notes or count my chewing, but the more I practice my new healthier self care the less frequent these days become. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0While I am hesitant to say that my coping strategies before were \u2018wrong\u2019 (I think it was right for me at the time), I have adopted new techniques that make me feel better. Self care looks different for everyone, and unfortunately there isn\u2019t a one size fits all self-care trick that will work for everyone. However I have been fortunate to find some techniques that work for me. Some of them may sound silly and that\u2019s okay! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Self-care for me is being open and not holding everything. Before I wanted everyone to think that I was some super human that never needed help and could deal with anything, I realize how detrimental that was to my health. I was always stressed, my body hurt and I never slept enough. I couldn\u2019t even enjoy time with loved ones without finding something I could control and \u00a0do. However with love and support I was able to find new ways to care for myself. I am now more open about how I am feeling, instead of always saying I\u2019m fine, I am honest about how I really am feeling with a few close loved ones. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0Additionally, I accept that my school work isn\u2019t perfect. I enjoy school and learning so much more now that I can focus on just absorbing the material rather than my need to have the same notes four times. I go to the gym and take walks sounds simple, because it it but it helps me. If I want to dedicate my life to helping others I need to first learn to help myself. \u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Self care is important for everyone- including myself. This a basic, and almost obvious statement but for me it took me far too long to realize. When I get stressed the way I cope is by doing more. This may seem counterintuitive, and often it is. Whenever I feel overwhelmed by school, family, friends or […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13368,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[5],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/179"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13368"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=179"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/179\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":180,"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/179\/revisions\/180"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=179"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=179"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.bu.edu\/daniellerousseau\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=179"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}